Writing Exercises

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Tunglewood is a native of South Eastern Australian Eucalyptus forests, mostly growing alongside rivers and creeks. Producing a superb range of timber types within a single tree, tunglewood is at its best when suffused with simian urine. To ensure consistent quality and ph level, only large Bladder monkeys are used for all infusion processing.

Kept in sterile yet comfortable surroundings, troops of bladder monkeys urinate (in shifts, 24/7) over untreated sections of tunglewood to create ‘dressed timber’. In closely guarded plantations, wild tunglewood trees are infused using roaming bands of bladder monkeys. While consistency is difficult for plantation managers to guarantee and quality is inconsistent, there is a booming market for organic tunglewood.

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